Confession Time!
I don’t make my bed everyday. I actually don’t make it most days. I could probably count on two hands how many times a year I do make my bed.
I don’t make my kids make their beds either.
And you know what? I’m okay with it; I don’t stress over it. I used to, but not anymore.
I grew up in a home where my mom made her bed everyday (and she still does), and had her kids do the same.
I used to feel that if I couldn’t manage to make my bed each day that that was a check mark in the ‘fail’ column for my homemaking skills. I don’t believe that lie anymore.
I can make a bed with the best of them, but I just choose not to. And here is why…….
1. I don’t have time
As a homeschooling mom of 7, I just don’t have time. I know, I know, it only takes a few minutes to make a bed, but that’s a few minutes I’d rather spend in God’s Word or a few minutes I’d rather spend to take a shower (yes, I can take a super quick shower because most of the time that’s all I have before a little one comes banging on the bathroom door).
2. My husband gets up after me
My husband works at home and he works late into the night most nights, going to bed after me. Therefore, he gets up after me in the mornings and it’s hard to find a moment to sneak away to make the bed after he gets up. At that point it’s just not on my radar anymore.
3. I like to fall into bed at night
At the end of the day I like to just fall right into bed. I’m exhausted and can’t wait for my head to hit the pillow. I’m one of those crazy people who sleeps with lots of pillows arranged in just the right way and if I made my bed everyday, I’d have to rearrange all the pillows every night. I’d rather jump right into bed and head to dreamland as quickly as possible.
4. When I do make my bed, my kids mess it up
It never fails; whenever I do make the bed, my kids see it as the perfect opportunity to turn it into a trampoline. To them, a freshly made bed is perfect for jumping.
5. My husband doesn’t really care
I’ve asked my husband if he cares whether or not I make the bed everyday because if it was important to him that I make the bed, I would make it a priority and figure out a way to get it done. He actually prefers to be able to get right into bed at night without having to ‘unmake’ the bed first.
Believe me, I like the look and feel (emotionally) of a nicely made bed, but right now in this season of my life, it’s not a priority. Life wouldn’t be any different if I did make my bed everyday, and just because I don’t make my bed, it doesn’t make me any less of a wife, mother, or homemaker.
LOVE this post! When I first got married, I thought I’d make the bed. I never had to as a child. But it didn’t last long. It’s so much easier to fall into an unmade bed.
I’m in the same boat – I make the bed only when I wash the sheets. Also homeschooling mother of seven… it’s just not that important! My husband does like it made, but he’s not about to complain.
7 wow. My hat’s off to you. Right now, just two and I get up last. I totally understand. Do you!
I don’t make my bed every day either. Ha!
I don’t make my bed most days either and for many of the same reasons. Although I feel better (emotionally) walking into my bedroom when the bed is made ad the room is picked up, I just don’t have the time so I usually keep my bedroom door shut!
Love. If you’re good with it and your husband is good with it than it’s great!! No stress needed. 🙂
Love this! I hardly ever make my bed, just when I launder the bedding. Interesting, I read a post by another woman about why she DOES make her bed every day….I couldn’t relate! I also recently read an article about how an unmade bed can help deter bed bugs….so…go us! LOL Thanks for sharing!
I had to make my bed growing up. Since the day I moved out of my parents’ home over twenty years ago, I can count on two hands the number of times I’ve EVER made my bed—and a few of those times were only because we were selling our house & had showings. I don’t make my bed, my kids don’t make their beds, and we’re all happy, healthy, well-adjusted people. 🙂 I simply don’t have time for it, and I like to be able to fall into bed at night, too…and sometimes I even nap in the afternoon. 😉
Also a homeschooling mom to 7. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t. It’s not a big deal to me. If I do make my bed it’s because I need a place to pile the clean laundry.
I used to not make my bed but I LOVE the feeling I get when I walk into my room and I have a nice, neat, clean, made bed. At least one little corner of my life is organized and nice. Plus, we must move around more in our sleep because our unmade bed certainly doesn’t look as easy to fall into as your unmade bed. 🙂
I love this post! Now, I have to say that most days I make my bed. When I do, it helps me feel like at least one thing in my day is together and organized. lol I feel in control of my bed! That being said, if I don’t get the bed made, I don’t worry about it! I will not feel guilty (anymore) about not making it. I see this correlate with all of those silly ‘earthly world daily rules’ that have governed my life for so long making me feel inadequate when I can’t keep up. Thank you so much for sharing!
I’m also a homeschooling mom of 7 & my day doesn’t feel like I’m in the get-it-started-groove until I’ve had coffee & made the bed. Imagine. . . God made us all with our own little quirks. I prefer to think of my need to have the bed made as a quirk instead of OCD. Thank you for not bashing bed-makers. 🙂
I make it solely to feel like I actually ‘did’ something to start the day off…but not really, right? 🙂
Anyway, totally get what you’re saying!! A bed, made or not, isn’t the end all & be all of all things.
My bed gets made up almost everyday, mostly because my husbands prefers it that way and because he helps me do it. 🙂 If for some reason we don’t make the bed before leaving the room then I usually don’t make it. As for my kids, again it is important to my husband that their beds are made, so I do require them to at least pull the covers up so it not too rumpled. I do have a bad habit of not getting all my dirty clothes in the hamper….much to my husband’s chagrin.
I’ve started making ours – but then again hubby and I went for about 6 years without a bedroom, without a bed so now that we have our own bedroom, our own bed (yes, we both slept on separate couches for 6 years – how romantic) I want to make it look nice. I might miss a day but my hubby prefers a made bed and I must admit I like climbing into a nicely made bed every night (even if I too, must re-adjust my pile of pillows – and I think I need a couple more! ever heard Tim Hawkins’ pillowmanjaro joke, that’s me). Sometimes my children mess it up, sometimes I even lay on it in the middle of the day but I’m so happy to have our own bed that I like it to look nice. My hubby is usually up before me anyway. I don’t make my children make theirs and some days they do and some days they don’t 😀
I don’t make mine everyday either. I sleep better if I did make my bed, but my husband gets up after me, and we are usually already doing school work. My kids do make their bed before they get served breakfast; even the 3 year old has learned that (although it never looks like he made it). lol I think you just have to do whatever works for you!
Great post! I do, however, make my bed. It’s a pet peeve of mine. I absolutely stand the feel of wrinkled sheets. I will even get up in the night and straighten the sheets if they become too messy. Haha! We recently bought new sheets and for some reason they just will not stay on the bed *properly* and it irritates me to no end.
I’ll be the weird one (No worries. I’m use to it.) and say I love climbing into a nicely made bed. There’s something about it that feels so clean and relaxing.
I don’t make my bed or my children’s because we’re just gonna mess it up again when we sleep in it every night ! Plus who’s gonna see it other then myself and family!
I do make the bed, but it’s my thing. I usually sort the laundry on our bed so I like the bed to be made to make it easier to sort.
I guess I’m one of the weird ones too. I love the look of a made up bed, it makes me feel good, makes me feel like my room is clean even though it may not be very! I also love the feel of turning back the covers and climbing into that nicely made bed. I guess I should probably say that I am 63 years old and don’t have any children at home to homeschool and tend to, so I do have a bit more time. I think it’s a person’s own business whether they make their bed or not, your home is your castle and you are the queen! I’m sure there were more unmade bed mornings than not when my four children were young.
I don’t make my bed everyday. If I get to it then I do. If I don’t then I don’t stress. I have other things I need to do and no one sees my room anyway.
I don’t know why we “should” make the bed. I see no purpose to it. I can count on my hands the times I have made my bed in the last 15 years.
I love this post! I, too, grew up in a home where I was expected to make the bed every morning even if that meant dashing out the door and chasing down the school bus. I rarely make my bed now. I like the way the room looks when its made and I like climbing into a bed with all the sheets straightened and tucked.
However, I usually have a million other things to do in the morning, somebody usually wants to crawl into my bed after lunch each day, and my husband likes to lie in the bed and take a nap or watch TV when he gets home in the afternoons. It makes him feel like he’s messing stuff up if he does that when the bed is made.
All in all, we’re quite content with an unmade bed most of the time.
No. I don’t have time.
I don’t normally make my bed. Every morning my kids come in and sit on it and talk to the babies. So, it doesn’t usually get done. I love the look of a nicely made bed (think Pottery Barn), but my reality isn’t that of a magazine selling bed things. I am homeschooling 3 kids, have a 2.5 yr. old, and 9 month old, so I’m busy! I don’t feel guilty for not making it and I don’t make my kids, but truth is, I love the look of a nicely made bed. I also agree with some of the other ladies that it makes you feel like something got done! I could see myself doing it later in life on a regular basis (I have so many quilts), but right now I’m not going to fret over it.
I make my bed like I brush my teeth. Not even something I stop and think about or consider not doing. It’s just a habit.
I don’t usually make my bed either. I get up before my husband and so he makes the bed. If I’m in the room when he makes it then I help. So, why doesn’t your hubby make the bed if he’s last using it? And, our kids make their beds, but we don’t use top sheets, we only use a fitted sheet on the bottom and a duvet on top, so making the bed is super easy. Less chaos around you means less stress. Visiting from Essential Fridays link up. My weekend hop is live at
http://abooksandmore.blogspot.com/2014/10/master-bedroom-decor-and-weekend-linky.html
I love the honesty! I never use to make my bed either, but a few years I was dealing with some personal things and my whole house was a mess for so long. One of the first things I started doing was making my bed to get the house in order. It was a simple thing I could do when the rest seemed overwhelming. But I completely understand falling into a bed when it is all arranged the way you sleep!
I’m not always a bed maker, either. My husband sleeps much later than I do, and neither of us care what the bed looks like, so there’s plenty of times it was unmade. However, my mom always felt better with the bed made (3 of us are grown now, but she was also a homeschooling mother of 7)…her answer was delegation. She’d just assign us kids to make her bed among our random assortment of chores. haha!
I’m not a bed maker, so glad to see I’m not alone!
I do make the bed most days. I find it soothing to walk into my room and see that little bit of neat and clean in my otherwise quite messy house. Our children are older, but they make bigger messes! Maybe when they are all moved out (we have 4 still at home), the house will be neater and less cluttered. For now, I settle for a made bed.
I love your honesty. I make my bed most days. But I don’t make my kids make their bed and was wondering if I should make that a priority.
I love the look of a made bed but to be honest, it only happens when I wash the sheets. The decorative pillows come off the bookcase headboard and are put on the bed and for the 30 or so minutes before I crawl into bed it looks wonderful and then everything gets torn apart to go to bed. I love the feel of a beautiful room but it never makes it to the top of the list.
Love it! I currently don’t make my bed either. Maybe when the kids are all gone I will go back to making our bed.
I feel like I could have written this post, minus 5 kids. But YES! I don’t make my bed on most days, and when I do it’s because we’re having guests and they might see my bedroom, lol!
Great post! I do make my bed because I feel better seeing it that way. Plus I like to get into a made bed at night. If it doesn’t bother anyone in your house though then you get bonus time! 🙂 #mommymoments
I agree with your reasons to not make the bed. I never really make my bed. Actually, I just sleep on top of the covers and have a few blankets that just hang out on top of my bedspread. 🙂
-Lara
Guilty! I hardly ever make my bed either. I never had to growing up so it is just something that doesn’t come naturally to me. Glad to know I’m not the only one who doesn’t, lol. Although I do like the look of it when it’s done.
YES!!! I’ve read so many blog posts about how making your bed is the KEY to being a successful homemaker/productive entrepreneur/good mom and I just couldn’t do it. I sleep in a loft bed with my hubby and making the bed is SUPER hard when it is 5 feet off the ground. This is absolutely perfect and it is nice to “meet” and kindred spirit! Visiting from Time Warp Wife.
I love this -My sister couldn’t understand why I didn’t make my bed when we were working. He was second shift and I was first …someone was always in it. Now my grandson loves to take a nap in my bed so why make it up. You make me feel so much better!
I totally agree! All I do is make sure the covers are tucked in at the bottom so they are easy to pull up smoothly. Now that I’m sleeping in the dining room, I do two things to make the bed look neater when not in use: I put on the flat sheet with the printed side facing down, and I smooth and neaten the folded-back covers (with printed sheet now facing up) when I get a chance.
Popping over from the homemaking party! I’m so with you on this! I’m just proud if the sheets are relatively clean. At this season in my life bed making is just not a priority.
I love this post. When I was married the bed had to be made every single day. Now that I am no longer married…my bed get’s made if I want it made. It’s my bed and my life and I am content with it.
Hi, I make our bed every morning, or our younger children do. My husband and I both like it made and there is nothing like getting into a made bed at night, feels a whole lot better.
Now I could sit here and say, how could you not, why can’t you find the time, but it is not my business. What suits you is fine with me and I applaud you for writing such a great post and for being you. What is right for you, your husband and your family is exactly that – RIGHT.
Blessings
I have made my bed most days for the last few years, although I don’t think I had to when I was a child, because I’ve been living in one room since I left home and the bed serves as a sofa during the day. It’s pretty easy to make though – in very cold weather I have a duvet, otherwise a sheet and a blanket which I just pull straight. If people are coming round or I’m feeling fancy, I put a load of cushions along the back of the bed to lean on. Added incentive these days: the cat sleeps on my bed, and I’d rather she were on the top of the sheets than inside.
Growing up my bed had to be made every morning before school. I don’t make my bed up or make my child make his up. It gets made up if company is coming or if i’ve washed the sheets. So glad I’m not the only one.
I make my bed everyday. I used to not & I don’t recall ever being made to make it growing up other than for busy work during the summer, though it was optional (depended on how much money I wanted to earn at the end of the week). I started doing it about a year ago as a stress reliever. The house was always chaotic & messy, & loud. I needed a place to escape. My room was the only “personal” place I owned where I could go to relax. But to be relaxing, my room needed to be organized, beautiful, & clean. I started just making my bed as soon as I got up. I realized there was a small bit of happiness that came when I saw how pretty my bed was when I walked in. That led to figuring out a way to expand that happiness to the rest of the room. Bit by bit, week by week, I cleaned my room, reorganized or organized different spaces, & added just a little decoration (my husband is a minimalist when it comes to “dust collectors”). It’s still a work in progress, but I feel so much better overall when I walk in my room for the any reason.
Though I only have two kids, time isn’t somthing I ever really have a lot of. Me time = cleaning something. Yes, I’d rather spend my time cleaning, but it’s my therapy. It makes a difference in my stress level during the day if I don’t take the time to make my bed. But to each their own.
I don’t and I never did much as a kid though my mom did and wanted me to. I never have time to or I don’t make time anyway!
Love your post. I do make my bed everyday. For one thing my bed is, at times, my desk, and most of the time, my craft platform. For another, my husband moves around a lot during the night. i find it takes less energy to make my bed in the morning than to fix the sheets and blankets at night.
I am getting the same way and for some of the same reasons. I do make it when others are coming over, though, and ‘feel’ better if I do, but I just need to get over that. I feel so guilty about not having a pretty, picture-perfect house, but, hey!, that is so not really where I want to live now. Great post, Sarah!
BTW, I have a challenge you might like for your husband at DRAH. Blessings to you all 🙂
Haha… when I read the title of this post I knew I had to read it. It is refreshing to have a realistic perspective that allows for a bit of mess and a lot of love. We infrequently make beds too, for ALL the same reasons. And we are also ok with that. 🙂
I go back and forth; it probably gets made most days. I like it, DH likes it, it’s easier to fold laundry on and having the bedroom door open with the curtains pulled gets more light into our little house. I don’t ask my kids to, though – their grandparents brought them bunk beds last summer and were going over the bit about bouncing a quarter off the sheets (seriously, how does that help anyone?) and how making your bed every morning was the key to a successful life, and I’m thinking “I hope you realize that you’re saying this because you enjoy the nostalgia of telling them what your parents told you, and not because it’s actually true or helpful.” Making your bed every morning gets you a made bed!
Yeah, if I got up first, I would almost always make my bed, but my husband gets up after me, so I rarely make the bed here either. I do like crawling into a freshly made bed, so I always make it just before I go to sleep, which is so dumb. HA! There’s just something about the way the sheets and comforter feel that make me sleep better if the bed has been made. That said, no judgment here considering the fact that our bed rarely gets made either! 🙂
I would not make my bed for all of those reasons but then I got to #5.. My husband cares.. A great deal. He wants every bed in the house made every day. He gets very upset if the beds don’t get made.. So we make the beds whether we have the time or not :-/
Well, that’s a very good reason to make the beds Melissa!
I understand both sides to some extent. Currently we rarely make the bed, except when I change the sheets (which usually happens right before bed and so when I do make it it’s at bedtime, ha!) or when company is coming, our room is tiny, right off the living room and people can see in when I go to out baby down. Although we both enjoy a neat bed feeling, it doesn’t bother either of us when it’s not done. I really can’t understand people being forced to make the bed, or “it’s the key to success” thing, to me it’s 100% personal preference. I think everyone has that spot in their house that makes them crazy if it’s not clean, and it’s different for everyone! I’m thankful for this post to help take unnecessary guilt and shame off moms backs. I also would never force my kids to make their bed everyday, maybe if friends were coming. Right now it makes no sense, they both only have the duvet and fitted sheet anyway and if I made them make it they would destroy it in 2 seconds to use their blanket for a fort. Their room is right off the playroom and becomes an extension of playing space so Pointless battle in our house. However… I would love to have a bedroom to be my little oasis from the chaos of life, where I could go and breathe when everything else is crazy. We haven’t reached a place where we had enough space for a proper master bedroom but someday when we do I will make an effort to make the bed 🙂 not because I “have to”, because I want to!
Yes I make my bed every day, even weekends. I love the way it looks all made up with pretty pillows. It takes less than two minutes. I love crawling into a neatly made bed at night. Well worth my time!
I don’t make my bed every day. It gets made when company is coming over because our bedroom then becomes the baby changing room. My teen’s bed is neat but not made and my toddler’s crib and playpen just have the blankets or sleep sack tossed in there.