This is a post from Kathie Morrissey of The Character Corner
We have heard it many, many times: “You have EIGHT kids?! How do you afford it?” Others add comments about how they can’t afford the 2 or 3 they have. Many times people who say this really mean they can’t have a large family AND the high standard of living they desire. I’m going to share 8 tips that helped us afford a large family, as well as learn to trust God.
My husband and I decided when we had our first little one, that I would stay home to care for her, and any children that came after. We didn’t have much at the time, but we knew we had a God who promised to supply our needs, and we could trust Him. I will say there were many times when things were tight and we had to scrimp, but we always had our needs met!
God does promise to provide, but He also expects us to be good stewards of the money He has given us. We need to be wise and careful in how we use it. I’m going to share some tips we learned as we raised our 8 kids on my husband’s income.
8 TIPS TO AFFORDING A LARGE FAMILY
1. Be in agreement with your spouse.
It’s very important to sit down with your spouse, and set up a budget that you can both agree on. A married couple is supposed to be a team, and it won’t work if one of you is off doing your own thing financially. Once you agree on the budget, you both need to follow it. For instance, if you need mortgage services, a Mortgage Advisor in Belfast can get you a good DSCR mortgage loan rate. Hire the best Highline Mortgage to help you process and prepare all the documents.
2. Always tithe!
No matter HOW tight the budget is, this is a Bible principle that we need to obey. If you get into the habit of tithing, you don’t even really think about it. And God promises to bless you when you are faithful in tithing. (Malachi 3:10)
3. Don’t go into debt!
The biggest thing that gets families into debt is the use of credit cards. We agreed to have a credit card for certain things like booking a motel, or emergency car repairs. However, we agreed that we would ALWAYS, ALWAYS pay the bill in full the next month, so we never incur any finance charges. If you don’t have the self-discipline for this, it’s better to get rid of the cards, and use a cash envelope system.
4. Plan ahead and save regularly for big ticket items you are going to need, or want.
For example, if you know your washer is nearing the end, start saving for a new one. When you reach the goal and can buy the items you’ve saved for, you really appreciate them more. If you choose Vigilant Wealth Management to help you manage your finances, check out the team who you will work with.
5. Don’t overspend on gifts.
As Christians, we aren’t supposed to be materialistic, and if we don’t start buying our kids lots of stuff, they won’t expect it. Instead, they will appreciate it more when they do get things. Decide on a reasonable amount that you are going to spend for birthdays and Christmas, then stick to that amount.
When our kids were young, I got most of their toys from garage sales. You can find many nice toys, almost like new, at garage sales for a fraction of the original cost. Second hand shops are great too. The same thing goes for kids clothes. They outgrow them so fast that you can buy them used, but like new, and save a lot of money.
6. Make a menu, and stick to it.
Write a grocery list to include what is needed for the menu, and buy only what is on the list, for example, eggs, additive free canned meat variety pack, etc. When shopping without a list you automatically end up spending more, as you pick up an extra thing here and there.
Also, try to shop where prices are lowest. For many years when the kids were young, my husband went to Aldi and bought almost all of our groceries there. We were able to spend a surprisingly small amount on groceries, compared to what most families spend.
Another things that helped us save on groceries: we never bought junk food. We didn’t buy sugary cereals, chips, or pop when the kids were young. That alone cut quite a bit off our grocery bill. I would bake once a week, and that was a treat we all looked forward to.
7. Combine trips, and shop online.
With a big family, going to the store for frequent, leisurely shopping trips is impossible, not to mention that it wastes time and money. Before going out on errands, make a list of all the places you need to go, the things to look for or buy, and do it all at once. When you focus like this, you can get a lot done in a short time, AND you don’t just randomly go spend money on things. Buying things online is also a money and time saver.
8. Learn to pray and trust God.
I can look back at so many times when we had to pray and trust that God would supply certain needs. Over time we learned to leave the need with Him, sit back, and watch to see what He would do.
It has been SO exciting to see the many times, and ways that He has provided for us. Even MORE exciting was that my kids SAW God provide, and they too, learned to trust Him. You can read my favorite story of how God proved Himself to us here: “I Said I Couldn’t Trust God.”
Following these 8 tips to afford a large family has helped us over the years. We may not have always had the best of everything, but we always had enough. Also, through the many times of seeing our needs supplied, we learned to depend on AND trust God.
Hi Kathie. Nice to meet you. I am a mom of six grown children. We are blessed with 2 grand babes so far. A lot of the things you mentioned we followed, but had no extra money to save for things. We somehow got by tho. God always did provide. We at one time had a half acre garden which kept us all really busy : )
Hi Carla! I know what you mean about not having extra money to save for things. Sometimes we just had what was needed for bills, or when we had saved for something, a car would break down! But like you said, God always came through! A garden is a GREAT item – not only to help with the food bill, but also provides profitable work for the kids to help with.
Great tips! I will definitely keep these in mind as our family continues to grow!
Hi Joanie, glad you liked the tips. If you start following them when the family is small (a relative term!), it’s really not that hard then when the family grows. For me a lot of it just comes down to disciplining myself! (I WON’T buy the chocolate, I WON’T buy the chocolate…..) lol
This was broken down so simply I like the ” no leisurely shopping trips” we also try to as you suggested to only shop with a purpose and a list. We also keep a weekly menu, there was a few weeks this winter I didn’t do a menu and found us overspending for our family of 6(4 children 2 adults)! Good stuff here 🙂
Thanks Brienne! I appreciate your encouraging words. Yes – when I don’t have a menu, or *ahem* forget to start things early in the day(!) we end up making extra runs to the store, or buying pizza. Definitely doesn’t help with the budget plan. 🙂
These are great tips! We don’t have a particularly large family, but twins definitely threw us for a loop and being financially aware became that much more important. Visiting you from HDYDI. Have a great week!
Hi Katy! Thanks for stopping in. Love the name of you blog! With twins, I would imagine there would be some chaos – especially in the early years!
stoppying by from the linky party Anything Goes Monday. come visit my blog, I have a giveaway.. I have 8 grandkids and Pawpa said draw names christmas.. lol
Shirley, thanks so much for stopping in! Drawing names for Christmas is actually an awesome idea. Now that some of my kids are married, and finances are tight for them, they are talking about the siblings drawing names, and each of them just buying for one sibling.
I “only” have 5 kids but I second every single one of these tips. Planning and self-discipline along with recognizing the difference between needs and wants are how we make living on a single income with 5 kids work.
Stephanie, You “only” have 5 kids?! lol Anymore, whether we have 1 or 10, we have to be careful about how we use the money that God gives us. Planning is definitely a key in making it work!
I have five kids and stay at home. God has always taken care of us. I have learned to be frugal as staying home is best for my family.
Tara, it’s great how we learn to adjust our spending as needed, as our families grow. Better yet is having the promise that God will supply all our needs! -Kathie
Great tips–We have 8 as well. 🙂
–Gena
Hi Gena – you probably could add a couple extra thoughts to this post! 🙂
Your suggestions are right on! And many of us only have a few kids (so far), but these principles apply so much to us as well because I have found that by starting off our family with these habits, it makes it easier to have a little more breathing room later, financially speaking. Frugality definitely pays off.
Gabby, you are so right! When you start your family off with the right habits, and shaping values in the right direction it is much easier than trying to change it all later.
I have three but we make it a point to make ‘fun’ days not about spending money. We have walks at the park and pack a picnic, wade through the river, and one of our favorites is invite a friend for a free day (we invite another homeschool family to our farm for a day of fun…free…. making it a point not to spend money). Our family loves to spread the word of God and share our way of life with people we know who live in the city.
Diane, that is such a GOOD point! We really don’t have to spend money to have fun with our kids. It doesn’t take much to make them happy, and often there are simple things like you mentioned that we can do with them that are free. Great idea to invite another family over also for a free day of fun!
These are great tips! Consolidating our trips and being careful with gift amounts has saved us a ton. So has meal planning, when I’m doing it faithfully! Finding grocery items on Amazon is something I only recently discovered as a valid, frugal choice in some cases, as long as I’m comparing prices correctly.
Tauna, I haven’t actually tried the Amazon shopping yet for groceries, but my two oldest daughters have just started doing that, and really like having groceries come right to their door. That’s probably something I will start looking into soon!
Thanks for sharing! I have stayed home since our son was born six years ago. Before that it was 3 years of college. I wanted to be a teacher. God had other plans for me that I never imagined.
Our families don’t get why I’ve stayed home even when my husband was out of a job for long periods of time. God has provided for sure! We are working on the budgeting and tithing at the moment.Thanks so much for the great tips!
Jacquie, I think it’s great that you chose to stay home with your son, and trust God to supply! And you are a real teacher at home! 🙂
We only have 5, but I so agree with these tips–and I love Aldis! Sharing with others!
Thanks for sharing, Tammy! When the kids were little, my husband made a weekly trip to Aldi, and took some of the kids with him to “help”. They loved running and grabbing items, then helping to box them up after checkout. Nothing like making a money saving trip to the grocery store a family outing! 🙂
We totally have 5 Birthdays (all 4 kids + Hunny’s) from Nov 1 – Jan 1 … Plus Christmas. Our kids do not get gifts more than $20 each. and a Birthday meal (often out but limited to Daddy Date or Mommy Date Night… ) For Christmas now that the kids are older (15-11 yrs) we upped it to $40 but even then I am a “Sales” and Second Hand shopper!
We have a meal menu for 9 weeks, and I have “standbys” that are faster to cook for those “oops” nights that I dont get it in early enough. — they are often things my family likes, but aren’t on the Menu regularly. (Grilled Cheeses, Ham & Cheese with soup (defrosted), Mac n Cheese in a box with hotdogs, My kids still love Ramen Noodles – with left over meat chopped in …. etc — or Left Over Night.)
We go to the big stores sometimes and walk around, just to get into the Air Conditioning and out of the house.. but the rules on those trips are we come home with nothing! Mall the same way!
Learn about FreeCycle (www.freecycle.org) or “Curb Watch / Free offerings” from CraigsList or similar “Groups” of trading things to people in need, when you don’t need it any longer. I have dressed my kids for the most part from Freecycle for the last 10 yrs. — I supplement from the 2nd hand store… and ebay — for School uniforms. I also sell unwanted smaller items on ebay. This allows me to have a little extra funds when I need it for things like school uniforms.
Savings Account – and Use it! I think this is the biggest thing that much of America misses these days. Put it in the savings account and DON”T use the money…. SAVE IT!!! — Yes emergencies come, and so do large purchases …. Plan for them… and Save.
Kiristie, it sounds like you’ve got it down pretty well! It definitely takes extra planning when birthdays are close together AND by the holidays! It’s kind of like that for us – we have 4 birthdays between the end of Oct. and mid-December, then my husband’s on Jan. 1. We have 4 more birthdays then from Jan to the end of March.
Lots of great advice here…stumbled and pinned!
Patti, glad you “stumbled” onto us! There will be lots of good posts coming from the many contributors to this site.
There are some great tips here! I definitely need to get better about making menus and sticking to them, and my husband and I have been very bad about budgeting lately…and our bank account shows it. What is it that Dave Ramsey says? “If you don’t plan how to spend your money, then your money will spend you,” I think…or something like that. That is pure TRUTH.
Sticking to the menu is one of my biggest challenges! I love Dave Ramsey. A couple of my married kids try to follow his budgeting ideas.
This is such a great list of ways to afford a large family. My husband and I are trying to dig ourselves out of the financial mess we made for ourselves. However, we’ve learned our valuable lesson and won’t do it again for sure.
I can easily see how you’ve done it using these principles!! Congrats on doing it and doing it wisely.
Crystal, it’s hard to dig out of debt, but the relief afterwards is so worth it. My husband had to have hip replacement surgery a few years ago, and that set us behind for awhile because he was off work for over three months. It was stressful to see the debt growing, but we worked at it when he got back to work, and finally paid things off. GREAT feeling of relief!
I think #8 is absolutely imperative to affording a large family! I know that’s very often the only way we can afford any of the things we have or need.
Jess, the best part about praying and trusting God is sharing with your kids how He provides! We had so many opportunities to share with them how God answered prayer and supplied needs.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom and experience with us.
Laura, not so sure I’ve got lots of wisdom to share – but I do have 33 years of experience. 🙂
Enjoy this post very much, Kathie. We also have 8 children and often hear, “But how do you_____(fill in the blank)_____?” It’s amazing how you can do what needs to be done and have a bit to spare when you trust God and live out your love for your family. Thank you for sharing your common sense tips!
Thanks Linda. That could be a whole post — all the other questions we get asked, besides how do you afford it? 🙂
What a fabulous list of tips that are great ideas for both large and small families!
Thanks Tshanina!
These are great tips! I am the youngest of 9 kids. And God always seemed to provide for us. We have three kids now and it’s still hard to afford them, as my husband doens’t make much and I stay at home. It’s hard because he doesn’t see money the same as I do.
Thanks for linking up with HDYDI.
Katelyn,isn’t it fun being from such a big family?! My husband comes from a family of 14, and family get togethers are so much fun. It’s hard when your husband isn’t on the same page as you financially. You can do your part to cut corners and be frugal of course, but it works much better when BOTH of you are. Would he read any of Dave Ramsey’s things about money?
Thanks for sharing at the Thoughtful Spot Weekly Blog Hop!
I especially like the tip about baking #ParentingPinItParty
Some great tips here! Thanks for linking up to this weeks #parentingpinitparty
Kathie, this was an excellent article!! We used to do many of the things on the list, like making a list of where we were going for errands, grocery list, no sweets except what I made.
Hi! I came across this post from Probably Crafting. These are some great tips. Mr. Sexy and I have plans for more kids but now it seems that my emotions about our hectic lives are taking over what were the desires of my heart. Most of these tips weren’t new to me and are ones Mr. Sexy and I try to implement regularly. But we don’t always… In fact, I haven’t thought about tithing in ages. :-/ We will have to budget that in asap.
This post has given me a bit of new hope for continuing to grow our family like we have wanted to do since the beginning.
I LOVE these tips! And they would work on small families as well as large families! Thanks so much for sharing on Makeovers & Motherhood’s Welcome Party Wednesday Link-Up! I am featuring you this week!
Praying and trusting GOD is the way we have lived well with 8 people on an income below poverty level for2. Vehicles for instance, our last 15 passenger van cost us $5000. It lasted us for 10 years. We sold it for 1500 and bought a newer one for 3000. None of them have ever cost much for repair. Our last one kept acting like it was going to have transmission problems for the pad 5years but it never did. God is faithful. We’ve never been good at saving up for large purchases. It always seems like someone else needs it if we don’t. How can I see my brother going hungry when I have money in the savings account. So every time we try to save it gets passed on to where it is needed worse. But every time we need a large purchase God either provides the funds or the item. HE is so faithful. We’ve even been able to provide a home for 2more little ones in such a GOD way
this are great tips. thanks for sharing! Coming from Mummy Mondays!
Thank you for a wonderfully informative and encouraging post!
I love this! My husband and I are in the thick of life, with 6 children age 13 and under and we are trying so hard to do all these things. We still keep falling on our faces but those months when everything is going well we enjoy the blessings so much. We just keep remembering to “Trust in Him”. We also have a testimony of tithing, though it can be a struggle at times we learn and reap those blessings. Thank you so much for putting this out there!!
DBP