We moms are busy creatures. We are pulled in a thousand different directions at any given moment of the day. It is not unusual for the entire day to pass and suddenly I realize that I have barely stopped to go to the bathroom by myself! (not that going to the bathroom by myself is really even possible with two toddlers and two preschoolers at home all day.)
Let’s face it… Moms have a CRAZY life! It’s a good life. A fabulously, amazing, and totally worth it life! There is no way I would give up this life of motherhood. But I do have to admit that some days it gets to me. And I wonder if I may loose my mind.
Whether you are a mom to one or a mom to ten, you need to accept the fact that you need to take care of you every day. If mom is out of whack…the entire house is out of whack! It doesn’t take much to give me the little reset I need throughout my day. Here are 7 habits that I have learned that as a mom I should do every day. And when I consistently do them, I am a much nicer, happier mom. And to be honest… a better wife too!!!
Spend 15 minutes alone, sitting down every day
Yep. 15 minutes. Just you. By yourself. No electronics. No little people.
Please, feel free to bring a mug of coffee or cup of tea.
15 minutes of silence makes a world of difference. If you have to get up a little earlier to find those 15 minutes, DO IT! Maybe you aren’t a morning person… That’s okay. 15 minutes during nap time or 15 minutes after everyone is in bed. No doing chores. No meal planning. No stressing over laundry. These few minutes should be spent letting go of the demands of motherhood and breathing in and out. This is also a great time to talk to God and to just listen in the quiet moment.
Hug your child(ren) and look them in the eyes
Ya’ll, I have a lot of little ones in my house right now. They are VERY needy. It’s not their fault. They are small. They need help with pretty much all things in life. On top of that, we are potty training a few of them which makes them even more demanding of my attention and care. I realized a few months ago that I was so busy taking care of their needs and the house and mealtimes and dishes and laundry and the rest of my mile long list that I was becoming a robot maid.
Taking the time to squat down to eye level of my children and purposefully look them in the eyes makes me see them. Really see them. They are beautiful. They are so precious (even when they are being extremely obstinate!). Looking into their eyes reminds me of how blessed I am to be their mom and gives me perspective for my daily chores and routines and the demands.
Make your bed and keep your room as free of “Kid Chaos” as possible
Pretty much the entire house belongs to the children. There is not much of our home that has not been “touched” by the hands of a child. I need a space that is a sanctuary and free of the “Kid Chaos”. Unfortunately, all of the bathroom doors in our house are no longer in working condition to lock. And so, escaping to the bathroom is NOT happening! My husband and I have made our room off-limits (for the most part) to the kids.
Every morning I try to take 60 seconds to make my bed. When I finally make it to our room after a busy day, I don’t want to be greeted with more chaos. Not saying that I clean my whole room every day or that it is perfectly decorated… But it is amazing what a freshly made bed can do for your sanity.
Connect with your husband
Don’t forget that there is this person that at one point made you the happiest woman in the world! Connect with him. Find a way to get a real conversation in. Even if you just squeeze in a quick text to your spouse telling them what they mean to you…a minimum of one connection a day is vital to keep that relationship strong. He may not understand completely what life is really like being home with those crazy children you both brought into this world, but you can keep the fire alive and a strong relationship in your marriage.
Eat a real meal
The crusts off your kids sandwich and three remaining bites of mac n’ cheese out of the pot does NOT count as a nourishing meal! Make sure you are taking the time to nourish your body. As much as you think about what you are feeding your babies and the nourishment they need, you also need to think of yourself and your body.
I would love to tell you that a mom can live on coffee and dark chocolate alone (because I would totally be THRIVING in motherhood!!!) But it is not true. We do need to eat our veggies, get lots of proteins and good fats, and nourish our bodies.
Motherhood is hilarious! Sometimes the choice is to either laugh or cry at the crazy days I have. Choosing to laugh is often a much better choice! If you need a good laugh, make time to watch a funny movie or read a funny mom quotes. My current favorite:
Laughing with the kids is my favorite. (Although, it is sometimes laughing at them…) Just last night my husband scared my oldest son while he was washing his hands in the bathroom and I laughed until I cried. The rest of the kids stared at me falling out of my chair barely able to breath. It was awesome. And refreshing.
Give yourself grace
Motherhood is all about grace. Grace and forgiveness. And most of the time I find that I am the one who needs to give myself grace and forgiveness. I fall into the trap of seeing all these internet moms who are so perfect and beautiful and put together and do all the little crafty projects…and I just don’t measure up!
I am over here thinking, “I kept my kids alive this week…That counts right?!?”
You know what? It totally does count!
Motherhood is a journey. It’s an adventure. It’s full of mistakes and mishaps and Oh No’s! But these little people who rely on us for the most basic of needs also thrive in love. They are resilient even in the most crazy of situations. They are quick to forgive and give hugs and love. Do the same for yourself. Don’t let the failure of yesterday keep you from thriving today.
Now, I tell you this, knowing full well that I myself failed to do all of these things today. I tried. Truly. I did. The 15 minutes to myself have yet to happen. But that is okay. I am working on me. And I am thinking about how I can be a better mom with just a few simple, but on purpose steps taken every day.
Since I started working on doing these seven things every day, I have found myself winning in motherhood. Not always perfect. But totally rocking it! And you can too!
What would you add to this list of Things Moms Should Do Every Day?
Keikilani (pronounced Cake-Ee-Lawn-Ee) was born and raised in Hawaii and now living in Detroit with the man of her dreams. She is a mother of six awesome kids. Their family was built on love and adoption. She is an addict of coffee, lover of food, giver of advice, writer of thoughts and finder of good things in every day life. Mother by day and writer by night. You can find her recipes, mom advice, motherhood laments, and foster care and adoption stories on her blog All My Good Things.