Not long after we got married, my husband and I decided that we wanted to homeschool our future children. My firstborn was barely walking when I plowed through all 700 pages of The Well Trained Mind…bookish nerd? Totally. Needless to say, I’ve been enthusiastic about my children’s theoretical, long way off, home education for a long time.
This July my oldest finally turned 5.
*Gulp.*
The first big question of course is should we start kindergarten now, or wait until she is six? Then there is the trouble with curriculum. Many educators say you don’t need a formal kindergarten program- as long as you’re working on the basics {numbers and phonics}, keeping the day as open as possible for creative play is ideal.
I know that studies say kids do better the older they are when beginning formal academics. I know I need to keep things enjoyable so that learning is a delight to her. And yet she is my strong willed child, often resisting directives. She is more than capable of school work when she wants to cooperate, and none of us like doing mandatory hard work. How much do I push her? How much do I just let go?
Being a first time homeschool mom, I also feel all of this pressure to prove myself as an educator. Homeschool nay-sayers aren’t going to get any fuel for their fire from our homeschool! I’ve never taught a kid to read… but I sure hope to do so. *Gulp.* What if I’m too relaxed? Too much of a slacker? What if my kids aren’t as smart as I think they are, or I mess them up for life, or I’m just never disciplined enough to give them a decent education?!?
Lots of pressure.
Of course I’m probably being silly. I’ve heard many seasoned homeschool moms mention their own similar fears early in their journey. I’ve heard that although home school is hard work, I shouldn’t stress out or overcomplicate it. With a lot of love and hard work, it is going to be just fine. Articles like this one and this one really encourage me. I just need to take a deep breath and keep it simple.
What we’ve decided to do {I hope} is just that. We’re working through a basic phonics book. Four mornings a week, my kindergartener and I sit down and work for just 15 minutes on a lesson. I do silly voices, let her hold a doll who she pretends to teach the lesson to, and try to keep things as fun and light as possible. When she is extra resistant, I’m trying to remember to just put the book down instead of frustrating us both. If she finishes the lesson, I read a chapter of our current read aloud as her reward {reward reading with reading :)}.
This summer we moved cross-country, so I’ve joined a co-op purely for social reasons. One day a week she sits in a class with other 4 and 5 years olds to sing songs, do art and science projects, and be taught by someone other than me. If we hadn’t moved, I don’t think I would have done so since we already had a network of homeschooling friends. But in our current circumstances it is ideal. Because the co-op covers some basic math, I’m just reinforcing it a few minutes here and there at home.
Other than that, we will just continue to read a lot. I will continue to send her outside for a few hours with her brother every afternoon. We will listen to all kinds of beautiful music, and learn hymns and memory verses, and color pictures. If for some reason she isn’t ready for first grade next fall… we can just take another year to work through our “kindergarten.”
And whenever I feel myself tensing up again, I will try my best to remember to breath. To stop worrying about what other people think, or how my child compares to her peers. I will try to keep learning joyful and teaching a delight. Somehow I will push through these beginner homeschooling mom anxieties and gain my sea legs. Someday, Lord willing, I will be able to encourage other moms at the beginning of their homeschool journey with the wisdom I’ve gleaned.
One day at a time, one grade at a time. The whole education of my children before me. Maybe it’s not such a bad place to be.
Thank you for sharing these thoughts. I’m glad you have a coop to join for social opportunities!
We did the same phonics book and lesson 75 nearly did us in…tears all around! We discovered that doing a lesson over two days worked better for us (even though they aren’t made to split and it felt awkward).
Good stuff! Unbelievably I’m one of those seasoned moms at this point, with my oldest in fifth grade, and I agree with the words others have said–don’t stress. It’s all going to work out and your worst is still better than the best day in a public school. You have her best at heart, and that’s really all it takes. Having said that, this week I have felt like my head was going to explode multiple times, but that may have something to do with starting my fourth in kindergarten. He’s super-eager, which is why we’re starting him a bit early, but it’s challenging to keep up with all the demands on my time and attention. Stay plugged in to homeschool groups–you need that encouragement and social outlet! And breathe deep and keep thinking of the big picture like you’re doing. . . . You can do it, with the Lord’s help!
Friend, I hear you. I nearly had a breakdown at the beginning of this school year, but I think we finally found a good curriculum fit for us this year and things have been going alright. (For two whole weeks!!! Ha!) One day at a time. You guys will do fine.