Happy Birthday sweet baby!
I call you sweet baby because that’s what you are to me – a sweet, innocent baby.
You should be 18 years old right around now. I’m not sure of the exact date because you never had the chance to be born. I selfishly and heartlessly took that from you.
It’s hard for me to picture you as an 18 year old. It’s hard for me to picture what could have been, what should have been. Today I met a woman that became pregnant when she was 17; she kept her baby and she showed me a picture of her daughter (the baby she kept) that had just gotten married. I broke down and cried; I took those kind of moments from you, from us, and we can never get them back.
I wish I could turn back time. I wish I could take back what I did. I wish you were here with me.
I’m so sorry! Sorry I took you from this earth, sorry I didn’t give you a chance. Please forgive me; my biggest fear is that you won’t forgive me. I know that the Lord has forgiven me, and I’m so undeserving, yet so grateful. I can only hope and have faith that as you rest in the arms of Jesus, that you also have His heart and you forgive and love me too. I pray that is so.
I take comfort in knowing that you are in a beautiful, peaceful place – in the arms of the Lord. This scripture and poem have brought me much comfort over the past years – knowing that the Lord is taking care of you and that one day we will be reunited gives me some peace.
Something good will come of your short life, even if you only lived on the inside. God can, and will turn evil into good. Hopefully other women can be helped through our story. There are far too many stories like ours – so many women hide, so many women hurt, so many women need to heal, so many need to know that they are not alone, so many need to know there’s hope and forgiveness in Jesus Christ.